Cultural Adjustment

by Ed Brown

Many cross-cultural workers go to their assignments aware of cultural differences between themselves and their hosts. They are prepared and equipped to enter that culture with a positive attitude and, in spite of barriers of customs, values and language, to develop relationships that will allow them to share the good news of Jesus Christ.

However, sometime between the two week and the two month mark, something often happens. A missionary will find himself or herself irritated, depressed and homesick. Nothing seems to be going right. Team meetings are sources of conflict, not joy. Language learning has become a burden that can barely be lifted. Physical health may be poor as well. Two years of service, a period that seemed short a few weeks ago, suddenly looks like a long hard trek through a wasteland.

Consider these actual comments from InterVarsity Linkers in their first semester:

Hardly missed home until everyone left last night and then I really missed home and cried myself to sleep thinking of everything and everyone I left behind. Kind of funny (as in "odd," not humorous), but I had just been thinking how well I made it through the holiday and what a good time of fellowship we Christians had yesterday and also how content I was here and being single ... when I started to miss my ESL classes in Wheaton and my friend J. who is the most handsome man in the world and my family . . . I should have just gone to bed an hour sooner. Anyway, I cried it all out and woke up with the flu today." (Eastern Europe)

One of the discouragements for me this month has been my slow pace in terms of adapting to British culture. Having lived here in the past, and adjusting to the culture once before, I had not really anticipated much culture stress in adjusting to British culture. Unfortunately, I have encountered much more cultural stress than I anticipated. I find that I really have to work hard at understanding what is being said (especially in groups), and that I am feeling culturally frustrated much more often than I would like. I am trying to keep a sense of humor, and not take myself too seriously. (England)

These Linksters are experiencing what we call "Culture Shock." Like jet lag, it's an unavoidable part of the experience, and it can be good or bad. With good understanding of the process of adjustment and a healthy attitude, culture shock can be an opportunity for grace and spiritual growth. On the other hand, if we go into it blindly or with false expectations, the result can be discouragement and despair.

So it's important that you understand what you're going through when Culture Shock happens.

Everyone gets it ...

Experiences of culture shock vary, but almost everyone entering a new country experiences some level of disorientation and bewilderment. Some of us catch it more severely than do others, but - unless we are really unique - all of us experience some kind of significant adjustment. The reason for this is found in the nature of culture itself.

Culture is language. And food and clothes. It's what time you show up for a dinner appointment. And how late at night you can call someone on the phone. It's body language and seating patterns and whether or not you talk to people in an elevator. In short, culture is the entire milieu of customs and values through which we live our lives and relate to other people. If we were goldfish, culture would be the water in our bowl. It's so much a part of our world and our existence that we don't even know it's there - that is, until we get pulled out of one goldfish bowl and dumped into another.

One of the reasons adjusting to a new culture comes as a shock is because so much of our culture is held on the level of values. We don't just practice a particular form of time management: we believe in our souls that our kind of time management is "right" - and we think of others as being "wrong". So someone who keeps us waiting for an appointment is not different: she's rude. At least that is what we feel deep inside ourselves.

Let's keep this same example going for a moment. What happens when you move to a culture where everyone keeps you waiting all the time? Your head says, "It's okay. It's not wrong, it's just different." But your heart says, "These people are rude. They don't like me." And after being stood up for the 110th time, you start to get irritated and angry. You're having culture shock.

How Long, O Lord? How Long?

It's very important to keep the normal culture shock pattern in mind. Everyone is different, and your own experience may vary from the norm by a factor of 2 - that is, you might have anywhere from half to twice as long an adjustment period as the "norm". We have found that culture shock lasts anywhere from 3 to 6 months, with the most intensive period for most people coming at about the four month point. If you are a typical short-term missionary, and you leave in September for your assignment, it is not hard to figure out what this means for you. You will be experiencing your worst culture shock at about the same time you're also experiencing you first Thanksgiving and Christmas away from home. You've got a double whammy to look forward to!

Two things need to be kept in mind about the cyclical nature of cultural adjustment:

1. We're never really finished with the process, because we can never completely break free of the cultural values in which we were raised. The initial 4 to 6 month period will probably be followed by repeat cycles of culture shock lasting anywhere from a couple of weeks to several more months. Some people would even suggest that for long-term overseas workers these shorter cycles occur within the framework of longer cycles, which take a number of years to work through.

2. Anything that breaks the cycle before it is complete only delays the process of arriving at a satisfactory "fit" stage. It may be a good idea to avoid succumbing to the temptation of coming home that first Christmas, even if Grandma wants to buy the ticket. If you give in to the first surges of homesickness, you'll only have to go through it all over again with greater intensity than before.

So what should we do?

Even though culture shock itself is unavoidable, we know that people who prepare well often have a less negative, less intense, and shorter period of adjustment than those who do not. They also have a more positive view of themselves and a more satisfactory overseas experience altogether.

So, how can we prepare? The following suggestions may help.

1. You have to say 'Goodbye' before you can say 'Hello.' It is very important that you take time before you leave home to achieve a proper level of "closure" on your old life: take the time to say goodbye properly to the special people in your life (parents, siblings, special friends) and to say the things to them you've been wanting to say but have never quite got around to. It's good as well to say goodbye to special places and even to your pets. Collect some souvenirs that will remind you of the special experiences God has given you in the chapter of your life which is now closing.

2. Accept the fact that you are in a period of transition. Give yourself time to adjust, and be patient with yourself during this transition period. You are not going to be able to hold yourself to your normal standards, whether emotional, spiritual or relational. You aren't going to be yourself for several months. Incidentally, you'll probably be on a team - and your teammates will be going through the same process at the same time: you'll need to learn to be patient with each other, and to be willing to forgive.

3. Be creative and flexible. You're going to need to do many of the things you've always done to maintain your spiritual and emotional health: prayer, Bible study, journalling, being mentored. You may find, though, that schedules and patterns you've used in the past just don't work any more. You may not have a lot of privacy. There might not be anyone available to take you under their wing as your campus staffworker used to do. You will find that worship in another language feels more like a language lesson than worship. All these things will happen, and you will need to find ways to compensate and creatively seek God's presence and his help even when it seems very difficult.

4. Find and use a support group. This will probably be your team, but might include other people you meet in your new city. Even if you tend to be an introvert, you'll need to make yourself vulnerable and be willing to ask for help and for prayer as you go through the adjustment period.

5. Keep a grateful heart and sense of humor, and don't lose sight of the big picture. You've been chosen to be part of the greatest thing anyone can ever do - you're involved in bringing the gospel of Jesus to people who have never heard. And you're going to do it. Hang in there!

Adapted from the InterVarsity LINK Handbook, 1999.

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