Thanks, John, for your confidence in writing to me. I’m glad that my answers project love for the ones who write to me. It’s true. I pray for each one and take their questions very seriously.

I wish we could sit in a peaceful garden somewhere and really unpack what you have mentioned in several brief lines, but until such a time as that may be possible, let me make some suggestions:

1) I think you have taken the first step by writing to me. It indicates your spiritual hunger and a certain desperation that pushed you to write to me, a stranger.

2) I would counsel you to very soon set aside a significant block of time to think through your situation. A good passage to study would be Isaiah 55. It begins with an invitation to those who are thirsty and ends with an expectation of restoration. Verses 6 and 7 give an outline to follow for that day:

a.) “Seek the Lord”: He does not hide but He does not reveal Himself lightly.

b.) “Call upon Him”: Verbalize, articulate your desire to experience spiritual renewal. I would journal liberally during your retreat. Let your “call” come from your very innermost self. Don’t be afraid to “get emotional.” Let out all your hunger and thirst and whatever else is inside.

c) “Let the wicked forsake his way”: You probably have a lot to confess. Try to figure out when your relationship to God began to turn cold. Undoubtedly you put Him in second or third place with regard to your priorities.

As in the Parable of the Soils, other concerns (both good and not so good) began to crowd out what God wants to be first in our lives – our relationship with Him.

d) “Let him turn to the Lord and He will have mercy upon him”: What a great promise! When we move through these steps, the Lord forgives us and meets with us.

3) As you analyze “what went wrong,” you will need to make adjustments in your patterns and lifestyle. You will need to think through the Spiritual Disciplines and incorporate them in your daily schedule. You need a friend (and friends) you can share with mutually, and who can give you accountability. You need to look for opportunities to share the Gospel.

4) The Lord may lead you to talk to a pastor you trust. There is something bracing and healing in talking to someone face to face. If he or she “judges” you, accept it. (“Faithful are the wounds of a friend.”) But make sure the person prays for you.

If you would like to continue writing me, I would welcome a continued relationship, but sooner or later you need to get involved with a group of people who will accept you as you are and yet are a source of spiritual nurture.

I hope that some of these thoughts will be helpful to you, John. I will be praying for you.

Jack

Here is a promise: “I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to proper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart (Jer 29:11-13).